Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Where Wise Men Fear to Tread

Fourth floor Steen Library, encyclopedias, philosophy, religion, history, law, education, music, and a party between the elevators. I have made two trips up there in the last half hour. At least they are on the right floor “HX Socialism; Communism; Anarchism.” I think they have settled down. Some I think I just chased off and some got the idea that either UPD or my self were going to keep coming up there, and some got to hear my speech. I tell them about the vandalism and how if it keeps up they won’t have 24/7 hours anymore, then I tell them that I really don’t care what they do just as long as they 1) Don’t tear anything up, 2) Don’t bother anybody else, 3) Try to keep you clothes on. I don’t know why but there is something about peoples’ pants and being in the library in the middle of the night that just doesn’t work out. I’m not talking about some guy hiding in a corner somewhere. I’m talking about guys and girls of all races out in the open, changing pants, having their pants fall down, getting tears in their pants, I don’t know what is going on but I think we are missing out on some great money making opportunities. We need a stand that sells purple sweat pants with “Steen Library Sweeps Week” on them the library logo. These pants would only be available during dead week and finals. Fleece blankets and purple U shaped airplane pillows should be sold, insulated mugs for cold drinks. Wade and I had this idea of building a deck on the roof or maybe just clearing out the fourth floor adding some lights a DJ a cover charge and some drinks and we would have the hottest club outside of Dallas or Houston. We would just call it The Library and have lights streaming up from the roof. My younger brother Will said that a library in one of his home towns had the local strip club have a “librarian night” where all the girls at the club (not the librarians) dressed up as librarians (or at least started dressed that way) and then gave a portion of the proceeds to the library. They made a fortune. We could do that with that club down by the river. I bet I could take my camera and get a poster session at ALA for that! (I wonder what my travel request should say? I could also get comp time for it and Linda couldn’t complain about me working harder to further my career.) That would also go along with that have a librarian on your desktop ad campaign I keep talking about. I’m telling you it is a winner. We would get lots of attention. Anyway things are quieting down. I should be able to cut my trips around the building back a bit.

Well I think I’ll see if Netflix has a copy of “The Full Monty”

R Philip Reynolds

“I’m to sexy for my shirt”

Librarian

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